Camp Cope + Worriers + Babymachine // UOW UniBar // 20/09/17

The 20th of September saw the UOW UniBar decked out with its small stage, on a particularly warm night, for a indie punk gig with a top notch line up. The new door on the side of the venue confused more than a couple punters waiting out the front of the bar after the doors had opened, but once people had figured out how to make their way inside the room began to fill quickly.

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Australian Traditions Are Stupid And So Are You

In Australia, the first Sunday in September is generally recognised as Father’s Day. While some may claim it has religious traditions dating back to the 14th and 15th centuries, deep down, they would know this claim is horseshit, as that particular reference is strictly relegated to the feast of Saint Joseph on March 19.
No, the fact is, it comes from the American tradition that was borne out of a seemingly honest attempt to replicate Mother’s Day for men. Except, within 30 years it had become a wholly corporatist event, aimed at selling ties, pipes, socks, and anything else that might be seen as a ‘gift for men’. The Father’s Day Council was founded by the New York Associated Men’s Wear Retailers, to establish the event as a reason to shop exclusively for fathers.
This week, there have been a number of articles and hot-takes written about attempts to corrupt this day, to turn it into some kind of de-gendered monstrosity, all about celebrating “special persons” so as to be more inclusive. If this is offensive to you, you’re an idiot. If this seems like a good idea, you’re also an idiot.
The whole event exists to perpetuate capitalism in the worst way, by pandering to sentimental jerk-offs who forget that any day or weekend can be used to celebrate one or both of your parents, friends, family, those around you or those far away. All it takes is initiative and a sense of selflessness. Rather than waiting for September to buy a coffee mug or gift card that your dad will never use, call him during the week. And if you don’t have a dad, then call someone who means a lot to you and tell them that they are a special person for you.
If you are relying on a capitalist celebration to push you towards doing something nice for someone who may or may not have raised you, then you’re probably a total wanker. I say this as someone who has a father and is a father, if you want to celebrate it, go ahead, and if you don’t want to, then don’t.
Either way, stop pretending that Father’s Day is carved in stone and must be upheld to protect the fabric of society, without which, everything would collapse, because that’s stupid, and so are you.

Australia Day is another one that can get in the bin. If anything, it should exist as a bogan Thanksgiving, recognising that there were people here before the white criminals showed up, and that the genocide didn’t actually begin on day one.
There should also be a national reminder that the ships sailed into Botany Bay between 18 – 20 January, arriving in Sydney Harbour on 26 January. I have to mention this, because too many Australians are ignorant of the history of the invasion this country, despite wearing white settlement here as a badge of honour.
The national day of celebration for Australia should really be 1 January, the date Australia federated, that is, at least, until we have a referendum to become a Republic, at which point, Australia Day would change to that date.
In the meantime, stop being such precious snowflakes about the fact that 26 January 1788 is seen by many to be the beginning of the end for the oldest continuous culture in the history of this planet.
What’s more, the celebration of Australia Day as a public holiday didn’t really begin until 1994. So you’ve got this allegedly sacred tradition dating back… 23 years. Your tantrums about the history of this date and what it should mean are the definition of stupid. I’m older than the Australia Day public holiday.
Stop pretending that Australia Day is carved in stone and must be upheld to protect the fabric of society, without which, everything would collapse, because that’s stupid, and so are you. Also, the date of the Triple J hottest 100 has changed a number of times since its inception, so fuck right off with that one too.

The Melbourne Cup is a celebration of cruelty to animals, alcoholism and family violence. It is not a sport and it is not worth protecting. The NSW ban on greyhound racing was the first example of brave legislation in this country since John Howard’s gun ban… before the cowards backed down to allow the mass slaughter of dogs to recommence under the false guise of sporting, in the protection of gambling as a national pastime. It could have been a shift toward outlawing animal exploitation for the entertainment of addicts, instead we’re forced to watch as countless animals are slowly tortured to death for our entertainment. How fun.
Four horses have died in as many recent Melbourne Cups. Every year a string of articles pop up decrying the countless problems stemming from this one day, including the fact that there is a significant spike in domestic violence on the first Tuesday in November. When humourless cunts talk about the fun police trying to ruin the Melbourne Cup for them, it would be wise to direct them to speak with the actual police, who are at the coalface on Cup day.
This is an event that enjoys a public holiday in Victoria, a day dedicated to gambling, alcohol and beating horses to make them run until their lungs bleed. If you truly believe that this is a tradition worth protecting, take a long walk off a short pier.
Stop pretending that the Melbourne Cup is carved in stone and must be upheld to protect the fabric of society, without which, everything would collapse, because that’s stupid, and so are you.

In summation, traditions can and should change. New traditions are formed every day. Forming new holidays and events that are inclusive, positive and don’t active encourage damaging behaviour are what we should be working towards in this country. And if you disagree, don’t worry, that’s just because you are really just a spineless, small-minded cockwaffle.
Sit down, shut up, and read something that disagrees with your preconceived notions of how the world should be, you goddamned idiot.


Obscure pop culture references and tepid takes on newsworthy events. It’s what your Nan would write if she was straight, white and male. In simple terms, Dean Cool is what you’d get if Andrew Bolt hate-fucked John Oliver in front of a middle-class millennial audience. So we gave him a weekly column. 
You can find him on Twitter or at shutupandreadthis. He also writes single-tweet film reviews, but they’re not very good.

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You May Be Worse Than Tony Abbott

I’m just going to say it. Anyone boycotting the vote in this bullshit postal plebiscite is worse than Tony Abbott. He may be a homophobic piece of shit, but at least he’s standing up for what he believes in. This is your chance to shut him up. Are you really going to roll over and let him win again?

Of course, I’m no idiot, I know you don’t want to have to ask all of Australia permission to express your love in public. But I’m not telling you to do that. If you can’t bring yourself to campaign for your own human rights, I’m not going to judge you.
You have allies. You have friends. We will campaign for you. We want what you want, and we will fight harder than that vocal minority of small-minded zealots.
No one who is actually for marriage equality wanted this campaign, but, considering how committed this government is to blowing $122 million on a plebiscite that is set to make allowances for vilification, hatred and corruption, we have to work with what we’ve got. The religious extremists don’t want you to vote. They’re campaigning for apathy. They’re shifting the goalposts to make it a battle of left versus right, political correctness versus freedom of speech, spineless ex-banker versus Prime Minister-in-exile.
The fact is, if the “No” campaign wins this plebiscite, it’s game over for marriage equality in this country. They will say this was a resounding response from the Australian people, this nation does not want to change the natural order or God’s word or some such garbage.
When the “No” campaign won in 1999, it ended any discussion of a Republic for a generation. Should “No” win this year, even if Bill Shorten legislates marriage equality in 2019, it will be undercut by this vote. It will be seen as invalid.
This nation tends to respect the outcomes of elections. Abbott fought hard to undermine Gillard after the 2010 election, but at the end of the day, she was PM and he wasn’t. If Abbott wins this time, he’ll undermine the entire LGBTIQ+ community.

If there is one thing we know about conservative extremists, it’s that they always turn out to vote; and considering they designed this particular poll to give themselves the edge, we know that their campaign against marriage equality will be relentless.
THIS. IS. THE. FIGHT. THEY. WANTED. They made it voluntary to reduce the turn out. They made it postal so they could manipulate the results and the will of the people. Our only chance is to make them lose.
All you have to do is vote. You can oppose the plebiscite. You can support the High Court challenge. You can talk openly about how fucked up and damaging this is.
But you have to vote.
Otherwise, Cory Bernardi and Lyle Shelton and Bronwyn Bishop and all of the dregs of the hard right conservative movement will win, and you will be in a worse position than you are now.
I’m sorry that you’ve been put in this position. The abuse has been ongoing for years, and it’s going to get worse before it gets better. But by voting “Yes” in this postal opinion poll to allow for a free conscience vote for the Liberal Party in Parliament at some stage in the next 12 months in a bill that may pass marriage equality in some form, you’re going to be able to shut them up.
They will be forced to accept that this is the will of the nation.

Apathy and intolerance caused Brexit. Apathy and intolerance elected Donald Trump. Bigotry, hatred, lies, and extremists defined both campaigns.
It will happen here too. But we can change the end result.
If we vote.


Obscure pop culture references and tepid takes on newsworthy events. It’s what your Nan would write if she was straight, white and male. In simple terms, Dean Cool is what you’d get if Andrew Bolt hate-fucked John Oliver in front of a middle-class millennial audience. So we gave him a weekly column.
You can find him on Twitter or at shutupandreadthis. He also writes single-tweet film reviews, but they’re not very good.

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